Good News

Good news!  

Your heart wants to lead you into beautiful love relationships where you are able to share your gifts with just the right people who are able to appreciate them.  More than one person in this world is aching for your insights, for the sound of your voice, and to cherish the weird way that you sneeze.  Their life is readying them for you, so that when you unite with them, there will be a spark, a chemistry, that speaks for itself, begging them to explore you and learn from you.  Amazingly, these people will take turns, and you will have time to savor the richness of each relationship, if you allow yourself to!  

And, it will get interesting when these relationships overlap.  There is more than one way to cut a cake, friends.  Polyamory (loving many) is about sharing, learning and growing, and once you find yourself free from the faulty premises of monogamy, your life will come alive in many new and exciting ways.

You love lots of people.  

Some of these loved ones may include your close friends, your brother or sister, cousins, grandparents or parents.  You might even have had an awesome teacher or neighbor who you will always feel fondly of, even after they are dead and gone.  This is "loving many", and it is natural to humans--it is part of the way that we have developed as community-dependent creatures.  It is not difficult to love your brother and your best friend at the same time.  Each of these relationships has unique attributes which make the relationship worthwhile for you in totally different ways.  You find that you are able to spend quality time with each of these loved ones and that neither relationship requires all of your time or energy.  If your brother *did* want or expect you to spend all of your time with him, it would seem strange, yes?  People would look at him sideways and ask you "Whats the deal with your brother, yo?"  A healthy love-relationship has breathing room in it and it doesn't need to control or confine you.

Another faulty premise of our culture: Once you are in a romantic-love relationship with somebody, they have some control over you and you have a right to control them, too.  

At first, this is a fun game and it feels joyful to surrender to the whims of your partner’s fears or fantasies.  But with the passage of time you will come to realize that it isn't working for you anymore.  The relationship had been so beautiful, like a flower, but now it begins to stink like a fart.